ever feel like your life is just passing by?

I'm in a philsophical mood at the moment. Been thinking about the future of course and how it freaks me out.

Like what am I supposed to do after I graduate? Is there any point in my trying, rather attempting feebly to gain employment in legal industry?

Lol... well the whole whingey essay I had planned in my head has gone to shreds after wasting so much time online.. Now all I can think about is Skewered Lamb in Beijing and my social plans for tmr!

In summary I unexpectedly met KenChai Ooi at work today with his gf. It was .. unexpected! and he looks so different 2! Man he is BUFF! He used to be the skinny short kid who hanged around Cameron Brooks! And now look at him, he's doing well with a part time job at Mac bank, which means he's guaranteed a graduate position- he must be doing well uniwise and he's got a really gorgeous gf 2... Very impressive I must say, and I do wish him the best (not that he needs it) for the future.

Strangely I don't feel jealous or competitive (very unlike my nature). I guess because its KenChai, I don't think I could ever feel jealous or competitive with such a nice guy.

Thats the thing I hate most about North Sydney. I spent 6 years of my life in such a competitive environment and I think I was corrupted by it. I used to be carefree and have other interests and passions that were more important than career and studies and crap. I'm so glad I'm no longer in the same environment but uni culture is not much better in this respect. Anyway I thank God for bringing me to bluesky which has given me the opportunity to meet other people who have changed me. Its a good contrast to the typical study-hard Asian over-achiever I'm so used to having as 'friends'.

Anyway this blog is running into overtime and I don't intend to edit due to laziness!!!

Anyway I think the answer to my issues lies in Matthew 6:33-34

"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own".

Keith~

so I can't sleep again.. surprise surprise

So its 2am Monday morning I'm online again! Geez, I really hate insomnia. And to make things worse I can't even watch TV cos to do so would wake certain people up...grrr!

Sunday was good, didn't get enuff sleep Saturday nite as usual. But it was cool, haven't spent hang out time with church ppl for quite some time due to non-attendance and exams etc.
The message was good too, but there were certain things that I didnt' quite agree with. Like, for example, haha.. i feel lazy to get indepth with it.. but the anti- Da Vinci code stance Pastor Barry took.. I get his point but I think people are more intelligent and discerning that he assumes.

Jo's 21st on Sat nite was cool too! It was nice being at a 21st where I actually know the person pretty well..wasn't one of those meaningless 'get drunk' dress up ones..

Again, don't really feel like getting into it, seems really stupid that I should be online trying to write a blog about nothing then!

CONTINUE? 9, 8, 7- continuation of previous post

yea.. oops.. shouldn't have pushed the 'Publish' button before. Anyway I still want to rant on about my life so I'll continue...

Yea.. Monday nite, or should I say Tuesday morning! Gave a friend a lift home to Epping and had a chat til 3.30am. hehe.. not something I do everyday but the chat was exceptional. It really cleared stuff in my head, like what I should believe and it really resolved some beliefs that I have.

ok.. well I'm assuming I slept until late Tuesday morning.. I probably woke up at 11 or 12 noon. Was supposed to spend some time with Kelvin but he ditched me to go play ps 2 with his high school friends.

So I went to see the GLASSHOUSE on Wed ( I think i mite have said in my previous post I that I went to see on Tuesday- cancel that)

hehe.. yeah that was fun! Unexpectedly met George and Kim there of all places. It was nice to meet Mel's friend Andrew (the guy that was supposed to be dancing) and Mel's mum. Very different people to the people I normally meet in my environment- not that that's a bad thing, on the contrary it quite a good thing. Yea.. it was interesting that religion came up, one of the comedian guys 'admitted' (admitted has such negative connotations don't you think) that he was Christian and he kinda shared a bit about his faith in a kinda humourous way. Well, hehe the glasshouse did pay out lots of Christian related stuff.. i.e. Guy Sebastian, Family First party, 'stigmatas'- footnote- the guy who pulled out a mole from his hand causing it to bleed causing a miracle-obsessed nun to think that he received the 'stigmata' of Christ. Hehe.. this must not make sense to anyone reading I imagine. oh yeah.. thats right, the piece of toast that had the image of the Virgin Mary, someone apparently paid $300,000 for that 10 year piece of toast online. Crazy!

anyway that was a good experience all up.

Thursday- went to TAFE, met up with some guys and girls from church to go K!!!! That was fun.. I'm still really tired from it!

and now its Friday, so I'll be going to bluesky :D

so apparently people do read my blog.. they just don't add comments

hehe... well i guess its kinda scary to realise that people actually do read what you post. I've thought all this time no one's been reading so it was a bit of shock to get comments (in person) about the blog.

anyway i'm on the phone with symantec at the moment trying to get my activation key reactivated. i've got the purity virus twice which has been a royal pain in the butt, had to reformat twice as a consequence which meant that my recently downloaded naruto eps have been wiped!

blah.. anyway I've had an interesting week, been out a lot at night doing different things. On Monday night I was part of a conspiracy to kidnap a friend to her 'surprise' 21st b'day dinner. lol.. that was fun! The hike to castle hill after from the city was fun too! The dinner was at cafe baia in cockle bay wharf.. try the Burrida- Italian seafood 'stew' if you're there!

Tuesday...hmm.. I didn't work did I, yeah stayed at home until night. Went to see the filming of the 'glasshouse' in the glasshouse (ABC studios in ultimo, when you go there you'll see why)

getting woken up is annoying

so i'm feeling pretty shitty at the moment cos I was woken up early tonight which means my sleep patterns are going to be out of whack for like a week...grr i dunno whether to be angry or annoyed or just be self-controlled and just suck it all in. Knowing me the best way is just to vent it out so I can return to being normal again.

I've never ever been woken up by people before actually, I'm actually quite a sound sleeper. That means the people that woke me up tonight must have been really really noisy and inconsiderate! That just pisses me off even more!

grr.. I'm getting more and more agro as I write this post. Maybe I should stop. Anyways I'm going to watch naruto eps 109 and see whether that can take my mind off things.

Keith~

so Elisabeth is gone.. good decision

Watching 'the Apprentice' has really got me thinking about human behaviour and management. Every episode I watch gets me questioning, why do people behaviour the way they do, and what makes a good leader?? So far this is what I've come up with, its all about CONTROL! A good leader knows how to control the group, not by force and coercion but by a subconscious, intangible cohesive force in which there is great comraderie and sense of purpose.

So far in this season, I have seen this force push the formely guy team (sorry can't remember whether it was Mosaic or Apex!) to consecutive victories. With the break up of the teams (now both teams are mixed) I see less and less of this force. It must be the damn women causing the problem! Honestly, I can't stand any of them. I cant' stand their cattiness, I can't stand their whiny justifications and especially can't stand it when they save their asses in the boardroom by pinning the blame on others.

I'm so glad Stacey J is coming back nxt wk. And from the preview I saw, she makes Ivanna cry which is what I really want to see!!!! Man I hate her, she's just aagh!

So I really think Kevin has the best shot of winning the whole kaboozle. The rest of the guys have good points but they seem to have more negative ones too. Kevin at the moment seems flawless, he's exhibits all the qualities of a leader in my opinion.

so law and social theory is done with, hang on a sec, 4th year is officially over!!!!!

so i handed law and social take home at 2pm today, level 10 UNSW Law faculty. Did I feel any better? No, Not really!

4 th year is officially over, and thats a scary thought. In terms of marks I've improved and thats reassuring, thank You God!, but I'm ambitious, I don't like to see people around me succeed and do better than me so I'm feeling the drive to study harder, push myself further in order to get ahead.

I seriously want to redo final papers for BA and Lit 2 and hand them in for informal marking. I want to prove to myself that I'm just as capable of getting a HD as any other student doing law at unsw.

Where does this feeling of ambition come from? I dunno, I guess its jealousy in a sense. Is it bad to feel this way? I really want to push myself to gain self-esteem and to feel that I'm able achieve goals that I set by myself.

Anyways more about it later! I'm glad no one actually reads my blog!
Nite
Keith~

blah..law and social theory

yes as my title suggets I've just about had it with law and social theory takehome. And its getting scary cos its due on Friday and I haven't even finished the first question! Aiya... I resolve to get cracking as soon as Norton antivirus installs.

I can't believe it, Norton has been such a waste of money. My comp got infected with a Trojan this afternoon can you believe. No more downloading from bearshare for me! I'm gonna keep my computer clean free of bugs and spyware from now on. And I also resolve to start studying hard again!

not good

so i had lit 2 final exam at 8.45 today...it wasn't good.. i've never felt so stuck in an exam ever in my life! I couldn't spot any issues and I had no idea what to write to fill in those evil blank exam booklets...in the end I ended up just copying stuff from my notes word for word... I'm hopeful for the best but IT DOESN"T LOOK GOOD!

In any case, I'm prepared to sit the final. I mean I knew the final was going to be tough but the questioning style was not dissimilar to past papers. I just regret not going to the library and the bookshop to pick up those law study aids. It would have helped so much better.

I've also resolved to make my own notes in a

not good

so i had lit 2 final exam at 8.45 today...it wasn't good.. i've never felt so stuck in an exam ever in my life! I couldn't spot any issues and I had no idea what to write to fill in those evil blank exam booklets...in the end I ended up just copying stuff from my notes word for word... I'm hopeful for the best but IT DOESN"T LOOK GOOD!

In any case, I'm prepared to sit the final. I mean I knew the final was going to be tough but the questioning style was not dissimilar to past papers. I just regret not going to the library and the bookshop to pick up those law study aids. It would have helped so much better.

I've also resolved to make my own notes in addition to whatever I get from friends. I think I really took it too lax this semester, I need to make my own set of class notes cos it comes useful in the exam! That means dragging my laptop to uni again nxt yer. Anyways I want a fresh start next year and I really don't intent to do part time work whilst studying.

At least lunch was good today even though I didn't eat anything. Trust Neil, Hannah and company to know how to have a good time! Lunch was good despite the headache, the depressive mood I was in after the Lit exam and of course the lack of sleep!

I'm gonna take it easy tonight before I start work on the Law and Social final take home. So muchc good TV tonight, including the Final Practice ever!!

Keith~

i can feel myself getting sleeepy .. zzzz

lol.. i wish i could get to sleep! I hate insomnia.. its crazy!

must be all this exam pressure keeping me awake.. when can i just take off to some desert tropical paradise where i can sip coconut juice under palm trees????

Keith~

troublesome.. hehe 

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T E E E T I T A N S

lol.. listening to the Teentitans soundtrack atm.. its hilarious.. when you're in trouble you know who to caaalll.. lol...

thanx Mr Pen for sending it 2 me, who wuld have guessed I'd still be in contact with you 2 yrs after I met you at Hoyts George Str.. man its bin a long time..

Fed Con is nearly done! Man.. need to wake up early to trim it down cos I've gone overboard again.. by nearly 100%

yay tmr.. I mean today is Thursday!!!! So much quality TV to watch.. Search for America's top model and the Apprentice!!!! Which beauty will be kicked off this week.. Takara, Anne, hmm.... I already know the answer cos I watched in on Tuesday (Thursday's episode is a repeat) and as for the Apprentice I'm sure someone from the girls team is going DOOOWWN! yeah.. those mean biatches deserve to lose..

Leaders growth group at JLO's was cool today :) I'm glad I went, I wasn't in the best of temperaments when I went.. and I think some evil voices were bringing me down but the Holy Spirit got me on the right track again.. so I'm happy! Thanks God :D

Nite
Keith~

Tuesday already?!!

Time is running out!.. oh well... must get Fed con done soon :)

Took a break from everything by driving to TAFE today, class was good but short, finished half and hour early cos XiaoHong (our 'laoshi') is feeling sick.. Anyways I'm now at uni typing up a short blog cos I'm bored and don't want to go home at the moment. Found a useful article for Fed Con just then in the 'Australian Intellectual Property Journal' lol.. that could be the highlight of my day!

Actually it won't [be the highlight of my day] because Bobby is coming back to the Practice tonite!!!! Everybody tune in 9.30pm channel 7...shouldn't disappoint.. I must say the Practice has become way more interesting since Shore came in.. it was on the downhill last season and I'm glad there's been a change of direction and focus in the series.

I'm outta things to say!
Keith~

nobody cares :(

lol.. lonely late nite blog rants.. they are just the best.... anyways i'm not as depressed and sad as my title suggests.. I'm actually quite content and happy.. my Fed Con take home exam is shaping up.. and so far it has been quite effortless!

Study for lit 2 final was going well this afternoon too, but somehow i got distracted.. and then i fell asleep so i'm leaving the rest for later today hehe

It seems that all I like to talk about is study.. aiya.. I'm so boring! but I don't care...hehe

Can't get the bluetooth to work on my laptop.. thats annoying me 2..
anyways~

things are looking up!

:) :) :D

things are looking up, don't know why i was so angry and depressed ysterday when i was moving the lawn.. i fink i have become very temperamental.. all these mood swings.. am i hormonally imbalancEd?

can't wait to play with my new phone.. i feel so broke after buying it today.. should be worth every cent tho!

Keith

Litigation 2

Is litigation really that hard? Its just more confusing than anything right.. after all.. the concepts can only be so difficult.. they are just court rules after all.. basic common sense right??

lol...this probably doesn't make any sense to anyone.. just wanted to air what I'm feeling at the moment.

So I'm nearly ready to put pen to paper and start writing my 'Fed Con' take home exam. I'm so glad I went book hunting yesterday in the UNSW law library ;)

Keith

Inconsistency?!

inconsistency can mean so many things.. in the context of constitutional law it could refer so section 109 issues lol.. anyways.. I wish I were more consistent in what I do.. i.e. uni marks!!!

Note to self and advice to others.. there are no shortcuts {As Naruto said in eps 52 ( i fink)}
remember never ever ever ever ever again to borrow people's materials and fudge a uni essay on them... and REFERENCE correctly.. i wish I were wise enuff to follow this advice.. would have spared me so much pain!!!!

Keith

Wk 14.. that means exams are close! nooooo!

Anyone watch 'the practice' tonight?

Been ages since I watched it, I was hooked back in high school when it was the 'in' thing to watch ;)